Mistresses Misconstrued Mistaken

Back in the olden days, mistresses understood that what they were doing was frowned upon. They knew they were a home wrecker and it was unacceptable in society's eyes. So they kept their affairs and their business on the low. Kids grew up being put on the wrong fathers or not knowing their father at all. Why? Because the mistress knows that Married John is NOT going to leave his wife and that her role in his life is insignificant. So she took it for what it was worth, raised her child and secretly reaped the benefits from him.

But nowadays, the mistresses think they ARE the wife. These guys have girlfriends with wives on the side. They are seen EVERYWHERE with the married man. They plaster pictures everywhere. Hell, they even call the house to make sure the wife knows about them. #Tigerwoods These women are off their rocker. They have lost their minds. Like in the instance of Steve McNair. What gave you the nerve to KILL...not fight....not run over....but KILL SOME ONE else's husband. I was blowed by this for weeks. Just could not believe it. You weren't even the girlfriend. You were timesharing the mistress slot with other chics and you STILL had the nerve to KILL someone else's husband. These women really don't know their role. You are SADLY mistaken.

So I guess I'll help you out because it's not your fault you don't understand. If your man is married, he is NOT your man. He is SOMEONE ELSE'S man....SOMEONE ELSE'S HUSBAND. So don't even waste your time. If you can't call his home phone or get him after a certain time, He is probably married or seriously involved. If he meets you and tells you he's married but separated or on bad terms. #lyingthroughhisteeth Don't fall for the okie doke, buddy is still with her. They are all on bad terms when they see a beautiful woman or someone who strikes their interest.

I understand that most women who deal with married men do so because the married guys cake faster and easier. This is because they know they have to compensate you for the commitment and time they can not provide. At first you'll be okay with the arrangement. But face it, you're human. And eventually you will catch feelings because you're spending time with that person and sharing your body with him. SO save yourself the heartache and the drama and entertain single suitors only. I know the ring and the unavailability makes the package quite appealing, but exercise some self restraint and have some self respect for once. Just do the wife a favor and let her keep her husband and the kids their dad. I'm sure they'd thank you for it. Besides, one day you may be someone's wife. And when the roles are reversed, you're gonna want Ms. Homewrecker to have mercy on you. So do unto to others and make better decisions. Love yourself because no one else has to :) ♥

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Simply Complicated

Life is so ambiguous. Nothing is abstract...definite...certain. It all has its twists and turns. You can plan to a certain degree but fate...chance...coincidence...whatever you choose to call it, will step in. I believe that everything happens for a reason. And that NOTHING happens by chance. Everything happens according to God's will for your life. Why do I believe in that? Because I am a very spiritual and religious being. My life experiences have shown me beyond a doubt that there is a higher being and I trust and believe in Him with all that is within me.


Now, let's step away from that for a minute. Look at your life. Examine the current situations in your life. Now reflect on your past experiences. Do you recall the situation you were in that had you on the brink of depression? No one understood what was going on and you were too drained from dealing with it that you didn't even have the energy to explain it. So everyone thought that you were over reacting. They criticized you and said you were weak. Now you look back on it, and maybe you were weak. Maybe it was simple, but because it was a new experience, it seemed complex. All of the circumstances you were dealing with contributed to it being overwhelming at the time.

Ok, now what about the situations that weren't really situations because you were equipped to handle those before they escalated to something bigger. And right into your resolving the easy issue the drama unfolds. There's a minor technicality. It's not so simple, after all. So your simple issue just got complicated and once again, the nay sayers are all in your ear. But forget about them. This is your life. These are your issues, so take as long as you like.

Some appear to have ALL the answers, but realistically, they don't. So no matter how well put together a person may seem, they are just as clueless as you are and is learning trial by error, as well. The difference is that they learn in private and somehow, your experiences are open for viewing. To openly make mistakes and learn from them while dealing with uninvited criticism warrants great accolades.

My life has always been an open book. Everything I did was under a magnifying glass. Examined...disected...put back together then picked apart again. And I became accustomed to it, to the point that I no longer cared about what people thought. What you say about me does not determine who I am. I continued to do me openly, always offering my personal business because I was proud of who I was. I feel my openness and disregard for others disent is a strength, but it also had its negatives. Why voluntarily invite people into your life that has no place or importance? Why disclose information that others should not be privy to? Why allow insignificant people to see the inner struggle....the trials of your life?

Those are great questions....so you should ponder those. Truth is, life IS a roller coaster. It's messy. You will take the wrong route, end up at dead ends, and make the wrong decisions. But that's nothing to stress about. You are to learn from your experiences and prepare to make your mark in the world. I would rather have failed a million times then to NEVER have failed at all, because with failed attempts, success is soon to follow. You only have one life, so decide what legacy you want to leave. All in all, life is not easy. It requires hard work. It demands perseverance. So don't take it lightly or short change yourself. Give it your all, if nothing else. There's no easy way out, Life is SIMPLY COMPLICATED. ♥

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What happened to Marriage?

As I counsel different people about their relationships/marriages, I can't help but wonder, what happened to marriage? What happened to the FOREVERNESS and the SACREDNESS? I am so tired of hearing people talking about taking half and/or losing half. I just don't understand it. Why marry if you're already planning for dissolution before it even begins? Marriage is such a beautiful thing. A union between TWO people VOWING to love eachother for their natural lives! It is ordained by God and pleasing in His eyes. The beauty of it has been tainted by society's materialism, coupled with infidelity, due to people's lack of respect. It's really heart breaking.

I don't know about anyone else, but I am praying for a LIFE long partner. I am in it for better or WORSE, for sickness or health, til DEATH do we part. I could care less about half. I want a WHOLE marriage with a WHOLE husband/father/friend. Half just won't do! I take care of Merchon, so half means nothing to me. I want a marriage like the olden days...one filled with respet and love, surviving anything....exemplifying daily that they are ONE.

I've seen a marriage of 57 years with my grandparents and 31 years with my parents, so I know that marriage is constant work. Marriage is HARD work, but HEART work. I've seen infidelity....sickness....confusion....dipping family members.....turmoil....but more importantly, I've seen LOVE and FORGIVENESS. I am aware that NO relationship is conflict free, which is why communication is essential in conflict resolution. Discussing your concerns BEFORE they become problems is the KEY to making your marriage/relationship work. My parents' and grandparents' marriages weren't always great but they had love and they worked hard to sustain their marriage. I can't say that I would be able to work through infidelity but I know it can be done. I've witnessed it. I see the love...the commitment. And I can only imagine how comforting it must be to KNOW that you always have someone in your corner that GENUINELY loves you and has YOUR BEST interest at heart, NO MATTER WHAT!!! Now THAT'S a MARRIAGE, so don't cheat yourself!!! You must enter into it knowing that there will be trials and tribulations but anything worth having is worth working for and waiting for! So stick it out.

You just need to be meticulous in your observations and diligent in your selection. Take time in your dating and indulge in A LOT of conversation so that you can learn what really lies beneath the surface. Out of the abundance of the heart, the mouth speaketh. Choosing a mate is about more than beauty, body and other superficial things. People go wrong by the things they put importance on. You have to pay attention to a persons values, goals, and compassion. Someone who's less concerned with material things and more concerned with life, love, and happiness. Someone with virtues. They still exist. You just have to be more patient and wiser in your search.

Despite society depreciating marriage's importance to the equivalent of a "social" event, I STILL value it's SACREDNESS. That is why I haven't jumped into marriage. I am meticulous in my observations and diligent in my selection. I understand that there is no such thing as a perfect person. However, FOREVER is a very long time and I refuse to spend it with the WRONG one.

Marriage is a beautiful union between TWO people ordained by God. It is honorable and deserving of the utmost respect and appreciation. It should be entered into with the intention of being together forever. When families split, not only do you lose a part of you, but if you have kids, they are affected. So please, be diligent in your selection and choose wisely. More importantly, PRAY about it. And until God sends who HE has for YOU, continue to work on you and strive to become the person God wants you to be. And I will be doing the same. SMOOCHES♥

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