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15 May 2010

INDEPENDENT WOMEN

Let's talk about independent woman. Men say they want a strong, independent woman yet they are intimidated by them. So the million dollar question is "why do they knock gold-diggers if deep down, they want someone who needs them?"

I understand that the term independent woman has somewhat of a negative image because some women take it to the male bashing level. But not all independent women are like that. I feel independent means that for the most part, you are self-sufficient and financially you provide for yourself. And no we, independent women, may not need a man for financial stability but we want a man for companionship, emotional support, and help in others areas. For a man to be wanted by a woman is the ultimate compliment because she's made a conscious choice to have you in her life. She chose you. She wasn't forced due to a need not being met. It was her free will.

I just had to discuss this topic because I am baffled by the fact that some men feel like they can't add to the lives of successful women. And these men knock those women because they feel inadequate. I don't think that's fair. I take pride in being a strong, independent black woman but the joy and fulfillment I receive is not at anyone's expense. My feeling of accomplishment, knowing that I can stand on my own should not offend anyone. And any man should be happy to have a woman that can hold her own and his too if there ever comes a time that he can't.

My grandmother taught me that being a strong woman doesn't mean you have to step on your mates toes. The strength comes in picking and choosing your battles....letting him lead and subtly stepping in when you realize that he's lost his way.

I encourage my women to continue to make a way for yourselves because at the end of the day, if the relationship goes sour, all you've got is you. But be open to love and allowing the man to be a man. Don't go into the relationship with a negative outlook...pick your battles wisely.... love...live...and compromise.

And to my men, I understand that there are women who make it their business to let you know that they do not need you! And that may very well be true. But she does need love, we all do! So you shouldn't let a woman's credentials, possessions, looks or confidence deter you from showing interest. If in fact you are interested. Take the time to get to know her, to understand her. Normally the harder the exterior, the softer/warmer the interior. There's alot of lonely people out there. She may not need your finances but there's so much more to give than that. Strong women...independent women....successful women....all need love. TRUST ME!♥

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